Wardrobe Dept

• Kacky Vest with lots of pockets - you can keep your Poke-Mon cards in

• Navy blue pocket T-Shirt & Blue jeans - both mean you only have to do laundry every 3 weeks

• White running shoes - make it look like you might be athletic

• the "Steven Hat" - buy one with a Miramax logo to show your'e a sensative type

Script

• Kinko's - Spend a few dollars to have a neatly bound single copy of the script you wrote in High School about a serial killer who lives at home and has a scat fetish.

• Who you know - Don't claim to have had lunch with Meryll Strepp, make it someone plausable like Danny DeVito.

• Samples of your work - Lost all memorabilia when your beach house slid into the Pacific Ocean last spring

• Your smell - Just got back from a shoot in the Northwest and haven't had time to shower

• Bobby - drop this name no more than once per conversation

Property Dept

• old lense from your dad's 35 mm Nikon - on a shoe string around your neck

Location

• your mom's basement - your'e scouting for a place to shoot a film about a serial killer with a scat fetish.

Casting
Try out your show biz career at the following locations:

• Strip Clubs
• The Beach
• Beauty Salons
• Shopping Malls
• High School Plays
• Adult Bookstores
• Rest Areas on the Interstate