BiNGE by Eric T Styles Famous When Dead

Scene: Jody’s bedroom.
She is rummaging
through a cluttered closet.
Pulls out a blond wig.

Scene: Jody in her back yard with wig.
She picks up a half rotted Halloween pumpkin
with a face painted on it.
She places the pumpkin on a fence post.
Places wig on pumpkin.
Jody steps off screen, pause, comes back
screaming with a baseball bat.
Smashes the pumpkin
in a psycho rage.

Scene: Lance in bathroom, sitting
on john reading ‘High Times’ He
looks up when he hears a thumping
noise with Jody’s muffled profanities.
He goes back to reading.

Scene: Bathroom door opens,
Lance starts to step out.
Jody appears covered with pumpkin goo.

Lance
Ok, do you have it out of your system?

Jody
After I hose off her brains.

Scene: Athena is at a marina by her
Mercedes talking on her cell phone.

Athena
So what did the art appraiser say...WHAT? NOTHING? Ok let’s see if anything changes after they find his body on Coney Island.

Scene: Athena is at a marina
getting into her car.

The wealthy man from Binge’s
art opening drives up in a Jaguar.

Athena pauses, smiles.

He walks down the dock
to a large sailboat.

Athena pops her trunk open.
starts to rummage through it.

Scene: Athena is on the dock near
the rich guy’s boat at a marina. She
is dressed as a sexy Pirate with a whip.
She cracks the whip, the rich man looks
up startled.

Athena
I am Captain DeCruel, I am commandeering this vessel.

At first the wealthy man looks confused,
then a devious grin comes across his face.

Scene: Athena is on the sailboat.
Wealthy man is tied to the mast.
Athena is holding an ATM card.
She menaces him with the whip.

Athena
Now give me the PIN number.

Wealthy man
(in a role play voice)
No! Never! Do your worst Captain DeCruel! I’ll never talk. Even if you force me to wear your panties on my head! I’ll never tell you my PIN!

Several days later at Lance and Jody’s.
Lance and Binge in Lance's yard.
Lance is trying to get a lawn mower started.

Lance
So, how was your weekend?

Binge
Great! I got laid.

Lance
Cool.

Binge
Yea, next weekend Athena wants to take me skydiving.


Scene: Ocean Ave. Athena is driving Binge. Binge So, where are we going? Athena It’s a surprise. Binge Surprises always have me end up in the ER. Athena When? Flashback to Athena’s condo. She is opening up a Fed Ex box. White Styrofoam peanuts spill out. Binge walks over. Binge What’s in the box, babe? Athena I ordered some new sex toys. Binge Cool! Let’s try them out. Athena OK. She reaches into the box, pulls out a TASER. She instantly zaps Binge in his groin. He collapses with a scream. Athena just examines the TASER gun. Binge slowly picks himself up, facing away from her. He moans. Athena Oh wait! I had it on ‘LOW’ Athena clicks a switch, zaps Binge in the sphincter as he tries to straighten up. Binge bolts off screen, SFX: Loud crash. Scene: In car driving. Athena Maybe the problem is that you're not man enough to handle me. Binge looks at viewers, grimaces. Binge Ok, let’s do it. Scene: Athena and Binge standing on a cold windy Jetty. Binge What? You want to have sex out here? We’ll freeze. Athena I want to skinny dip. Binge IN THAT? Binge points to dark green water rushing by with a swift current. Soda bottle and Hypodermic needle flow by fast. Vortexes swirl. He looks to a sign. Sign: SHARK RIVER Binge I don’t think so. With one move of her hand down her front, all of her clothes drop to the ground. Athena is standing there in just her thong. Binge Ok, it might be fun. Scene: Back on the jetty, Athena and Binge are both naked. Binge’s pasty white body shivers. Athena holds model like poses. Athena Ok, on the count of three. Binge I guess. Athena One....Two.... They bend at knees. Athena THREE! Only Binge jumps. As he looks back, Athena is picking up her clothes to get dressed. In mid air cartoon freeze, Binge looks to viewers. Frowns. Drops off of frame. Large splash is heard and seen. Scene: A HUGE waterfront mansion, wintertime, pool is covered. A lone man is sitting on a patio chair with a guitar. Slowly, playfully picking away. Close up to man, it’s a ‘Springsteen’ looking man. He starts to pick out the opening to the TV theme ‘Gilligan’s Island’ Starts to sing it in typical mellow dramatic Springsteen saga way. (The Ballad of Gilligan's Island by George Wyle and Sherwood Shwartz) BS Juuuuuust sit right back and you'll hear a tale, A tale of a fateful trip That started from this tropic port Aboard this tiny ship. The mate was a mighty sailing man, The skipper a brave and sure. Five passengers set sail that day For a three hour tour, a three hour tour. The weather started getting rough, The tiny ship it was a tossed, If not for the courage of the fearless crew The minnow would be lost, the minnow would be lost. The ship set ground on the shore of this uncharted desert isle With Gilligan The Skipper too, The millionaire and his wife, The movie star The professor and..... BS looks up to see a half dead naked Binge scurry across the lawn by his dock. Binge is covered with seaweed, and holding a chair cushion over his privates. BS looks confused as Binge comes toward him. BS Uhhhhhhh, this is like a private property man. Binge does not recognize him. Binge DUDE! Can you help me? Please? BS Uhm, like what’s the problem bro? Binge Besides hypothermia, I’m in love with a mental patient. Who lives here? BS Uhm, he’s like away.... I’m the pool boy. Binge Cool, it looks like the type of joint that would have me busted for trespassing. BS Let me get you something to wear. Binge Thanks man! Springsteen gets on his phone. BS Hon, could you bring out a shirt and a pair of pants? Don’t ask. Scene: BS Mansion. Binge I know from what I tell you, it sounds crazy. But I love her. BS What did you say she does for a living? Binge A dominatrix, you know a leather and whip chick. I’m not into the scene, but she just can’t leave it at the office. A second story window opens, a woman with red hair tosses out clothes. They land on Binge. BS Thanks hon. Scene: BS mansion BS I see a lot of symbolism in your relationship. Power, control, love, anger. It’d make a cool song. Binge What? A funeral dirge? I’m Binge, by the way. BS I’m Bru...Bruno. Bruno the pool guy. Binge So you're just chilling here while the boss is away? Cool. Scene: BS mansion. Binge Thanks for the clothes, Bruno. I better get going. I bet she has the Navy looking for me by now. Scene: BS mansion. Binge is walking down a long driveway admiring 70’s muscle cars. He is wearing a black ‘High Horse” Tee-shirt, and blue jeans that barely go down to his knees. He gets to a large iron gate. A security guard in a white SUV looks curiously at Binge. Binge speaks through the bars of the gate. Binge Bruno the pool boy said you could give me a ride down to the Keysburg Marina. Scene: Athena’s white Mercedes, the security SUV pulls up, Binge hops out. Binge Thanks dude! Binge looks around Binge Where the hell is she? Off screen a sound of a whip cracking followed by a man’s orgasmic screams is heard. Binge turns to the viewer, rolls his eyes. Binge walks up to the sailboat. Binge Thanks a whole hell of a lot! Athena looks startled. Athena OH! Uh, Binge! you're alive? Binge Uh yeaaaa, no thanks to you! Athena I was sooooooooo worried about you! Binge Yea, it shows. Did you even call for help? Athena My cell phone went dead. SFX: Her cell phone rings. Athena I....I didn’t know where to turn for help. Binge looks to his right. A few hundred feet away is a huge sign reading “U.S. COAST GUARD, KEYSBURG BEACH STATION” There are several boats and an orange helicopter surrounded by dozens of sailors. Athena I thought you were dead! Binge Oh, so you decided to smack around fat boy here! Athena You can’t expect me to grieve forever! Binge I’ve only been dead for twenty minutes. Athena You are just so full of yourself! Wealthy man Captain DeCruel! What about my bounty? Athena reaches down. Athena Put a sock in it. She stuffs his black sock in his mouth. Binge looks at the man, recognizes him. Binge Hey, I know you... Mr. Beach house. NICE! Two million dollar mansion, two hundred thousand boat, and you’re paying my almost girlfriend a couple of grand to smack your kinky ass! But a couple of hundred for original artwork from a starving artist is out of the question! It’s guys like you that cause communism! Binge turns to Athena Binge Hey, aren't those panties I bought for you? Forget it! I am done with you! Never again! It’s over! NEVER! Athena I’m so sorry baby, it’s been such a traumatic day for me.Come on, let’s go back to my place and have sex. Binge With each other? Athena Hmmm... sure! Binge Well, ok.	Scene: Jody’s bedroom. She is rummaging through a cluttered closet. Pulls out a blond wig. Scene: Jody in her back yard with wig. She picks up a half rotted Halloween pumpkin with a face painted on it. She places the pumpkin on a fence post. Places wig on pumpkin. Jody steps off screen, pause, comes back screaming with a baseball bat. Smashes the pumpkin in a psycho rage. Scene: Lance in bathroom, sitting on john reading ‘High Times’ He looks up when he hears a thumping noise with Jody’s muffled profanities. He goes back to reading. Scene: Bathroom door opens, Lance starts to step out. Jody appears covered with pumpkin goo. Lance Ok, do you have it out of your system? Jody After I hose off her brains. Scene: Athena is at a marina by her Mercedes talking on her cell phone. Athena So what did the art appraiser say...WHAT? NOTHING? Ok let’s see if anything changes after they find his body on Coney Island. Scene: Athena is at a marina getting into her car. The wealthy man from Binge’s art opening drives up in a Jaguar. Athena pauses, smiles. He walks down the dock to a large sailboat. Athena pops her trunk open. starts to rummage through it. Scene: Athena is on the dock near the rich guy’s boat at a marina. She is dressed as a sexy Pirate with a whip. She cracks the whip, the rich man looks up startled. Athena I am Captain DeCruel, I am commandeering this vessel. At first the wealthy man looks confused, then a devious grin comes across his face. Scene: Athena is on the sailboat. Wealthy man is tied to the mast. Athena is holding an ATM card. She menaces him with the whip. Athena Now give me the PIN number. Wealthy man (in a role play voice) No! Never! Do your worst Captain DeCruel! I’ll never talk. Even if you force me to wear your panties on my head! I’ll never tell you my PIN! Several days later at Lance and Jody’s. Lance and Binge in Lance's yard. Lance is trying to get a lawn mower started. Lance So, how was your weekend? Binge Great! I got laid. Lance Cool. Binge Yea, next weekend Athena wants to take me skydiving.